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California Lockdown Diaries

California was the first state to order lockdown statewide. One month has passed since then. It has become a new normal for us as the day progressed. I wrote about my daily situation and feelings for the first couple of days of lockdown, and I am sharing some of it here.

03/16/2020 Lockdown Day 1

Last night I couldn’t sleep well. The news of COVID-19 horrified me — so many deaths and so many are suffering! They’re saying it’s only just the beginning of this virus attack. Our Governor called for closing all the bars, wineries and nightclubs and urged older people and seniors to stay inside. Around 6 pm last night, I got an email from my office saying that it’ll be closed from Monday to Wednesday as one of the employees tested positive for COVID-19. Get to rest at home for some days, I guess! But in another email, they’re asking us to telework from home. We were all in a dilemma about not getting any clearer instruction about work which was solved at midday. I opened the fridge to make some lunch but only found couple of eggs and milk, so I need to go grocery shopping before it is too late! I have made a list to do some grocery shopping for two weeks. Some people are asking me to buy groceries for at least a month, which is crazy, right?

03/17/2020 Lockdown Day 2

It’s been a sunny day here in the Bay area. A day has passed since the lockdown was announced yesterday. I woke up later than usual this morning with a massive headache, but coffee helped enormously. It was wonderful to see the first ray of light coming through my window. Every morning before the lockdown, I would wake up before the sun does and leave for work to catch the Bart train in the dark. Once I step out the train station, it’s already morning. Today, watching the sunrise from the quiet corner of my study room sipping smoking hot coffee is a blessing for me. Working from home doesn’t feel so bad!

03/18/2020 Lockdown Day 3

Today’s the Day 3 of lockdown. I am sitting somewhere in a tiny little corner, but in my mind, I am traveling thousands of miles! I am reminiscing the beautiful moments of Montana trip. Amid all the chaos, my mind finds tranquility in the ice-cold sapphire lake. That chill down my spine when I dip my feet in the freezing water, rough texture of the rocks beneath my almost numb feet, swirling water between my toes, gentle breeze and warm sunlight on my face, beautiful mountains with its lush green and the vast blue sky; here I am free!

 03/19/2020 Lockdown Day 4

Last night when I got the email from the office that I have to go there today and stay the whole day almost while the whole state is under lockdown, I got a little panicked. I woke up around 5.30 am, unwilling to leave the warmth of the bed. I was in the dilemma of whether to take the Bart train or drive instead. At the last moment when I was out of the house, I chose driving. It took me 37 minutes to reach the office, while during normal hours it would have taken more than an hour and a half. All the public parking lots were empty and even the street parking spots too, which is beyond imagination. Though it was very early in the morning, around 8 am, but I would always see the crowds of office going people as soon as I would step out of the train. This morning the whole place looked like a ghost town, calm and silent.

At first, making daily diaries felt like a good and productive thing to do, but as the lockdown continued and deaths continued to rise, it became too much to maintain. Every day was the same, and writing about that sameness served to increase my stress levels. Since the first week, my lockdown has continued. We’ve already lost family members to COVID-19, and I can’t envision how things will be once this is over. How many more friends and family members will we lose? My birthday is in June, and I’m hopeful I’ll be able to celebrate outside with family and friends.


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